Monday, June 8, 2009
Our beautiful little girl...
I was 20 weeks and we were on our way to the doctors. Today was the day we were going to find out what we were having!! I remember on the way there, Brett and I were placing bets on what we were having. I knew it was a girl and Brett was convinced we were having a boy.
So we get to the doctor and sit in the waiting room. We were there about 10 minutes when the nurse called my name. It was time!! I get weighed and they ask all of the normal questions. Everything is going great! They take us into the ultrasound room. I was giddy and giggly! I mean come on we haven't seen the baby since I was 10 weeks! They change so much in a few weeks!
I lay down and they start. After showing us the head they move on... very quietly. I was so excited I didn't notice how silent the room was. After about 5 minutes I started to feel really sick and dizzy. The midwife offered to go get me some juice. As soon as she walked out, Brett looked at me and said, "Babe, something is wrong." I laughed at him and told him he was being paranoid. The midwife came back a few minutes later handed me the juice and walked right back out. I was a little confused. A few minutes later she came back with about 3 more people. They were all looking at the baby and whispering about femur measurements. I had no clue what this meant.They finally told me something wasn't right. I was rushed up to see a specialist. After another Ultrasound, it was confirmed. Our beautiful baby had a severe case of Thanataphoric Dysplasia. It meant she was not growing properly. Her legs and arms were many weeks behind where they should've been. Her chest was also measuring very small... which meant her lungs were not growing. The specialist told us that she would not survive outside of me for more than a few minutes and she would be extremely deformed. We were given our options... abort the baby or carry the baby. I looked at Brett and knew immediately that we were not giving up on our baby. After many many tests and specialists, we knew that there was no way our baby would make it. But we both still decided to leave it in God's hands. We found out at about 24 weeks that we were having a girl. We decided that we would name her Faith Ebita. Part of me died that day. I was getting the little girl I had always dreamed of having but I could not keep her.
Fast forward to April 27th 2006... I started to have contractions and they were coming fast. i told Brett at about 1:30am that we needed to get to the hospital. I had decided that we were having a c-section very early on since she would not make it through labor. We were giving her the best chance we could. I had Faith on April 27th at 3:10am. She was beautiful! She had the most beautiful head of black hair! After 6 and a half hours of struggling to live, Faith passed. I'll never forget holding my daughter and looking in her eyes as she passed. I'll miss her and love her for the rest of my life...
Posted by Colees at 6:58 PM